May 28th, 2006

silence


A conversation begins
with a lie. And each




speaker of the so called common language feels
the ice-floe split, the drift apart




as if powerless, as if up against
the force of nature




A poem can begin
with a lie. And be torn up.




A conversation has other laws
recharges itself with its own




false energy. Cannot be torn
up. Infiltrates our blood. Repeats itself.

Inscribes with its unreturning stylus
the isolation it denies.

--from Cartographies of Silence by Adrienne Rich, 1975

::There's many people to thank for this shoot: Amor - writer by profession, strange and smart woman. She graciouly and painlessly posed for me in this concept and promised to pose for more concepts in the future, for which I am very happy. Earl - Lexmark guy and Pinoypoet who came in because he is kind and curious. Ice, Mayds, Gem for joining us in the aftersession. Leland who offered us his research lab, which we didn't use but will prolly use in the future if it's ok with him, the Madame for the props...

I will be posting more images of Amor from the same session in the coming days. I don't want to bombard you with lots of images, so I will post them in series.

Posted by torturedsquid at 09:55 AM as a stickied post | 14 comments

May 12th, 2008

My lover falls from the sky



My lover falls from the sky

on this pleasant, rainless, early May.

neighbors, women and men out on the yard

I watch as my lover falls with a thud,

(Read More)

Posted by torturedsquid at 03:20 PM | Add a Comment

hello today

I probably should write something here, just to jumpstart the thinking process.

I realize it's been over a year already since I last posted. Can't believe how the world has changed so much. Where was I all this time? (Guess I need to update some things soon.)

If there's one thing I can promise you, dearest friends, it's that photography will not die on me. It never will.

Posted by torturedsquid at 03:10 PM | Add a Comment

May 8th, 2007

to you who cannot sleep

you will hear soft, gentle hissing.
these are not bitter curses but incantations
though of a kind that's known only to beings of my kind:








i will slide into your window
right through your bed where your restless body
will be lying, tired and waiting.

i am singing when i'm hissing,
and softly i will be hissing until
your thoughts are silent.



there will be no rain on the roof tonight.


-----------------------------------



about the shoot:

we were drinking and videokeing crazy at home one night when i saw kei holding the toy snake and thought hmmm...maybe i should take pictures. this was my first time to shoot while tipsy and with a model who's also tipsy. (makes up for a nice time.) am just glad the camera didn't break! bigtime horror if it did.

my cousin shiela was also there drinking that night. she felt guilty seeing us with all the mess and gracioulsy helped us with the setup. thanks, girl.

the photos in the two entries below are of kei as well. if you look at her eyes, you'll know just how much she'd been drinking.. more photos from this night in my gallery.

Posted by torturedsquid at 01:05 AM | Add a Comment

Walled dreams, and an awakening

I began this wait
many years ago





Snowflakes scattered across the concrete
ice on the pond
smooth and glittering in the dark night
and logs trapped in the water

The atmospheric blue will crush this rorom
I'd like to turn and walk away

I stare out from this pistine life

Sparrows beat their wings against the barn door
the stone mill stands among the yams
the air dark, dank, and cool

I look out from this small window with its smooth eyelids
sleepy panes of paper

- gu cheng, sea of dreams

Posted by torturedsquid at 12:36 AM | 2 comments

May 7th, 2007

we would be spared of all unpleasantness

of heartbreaks if we simply think as others think:

to avoid having nightmares,
one must learn to get by without sleep.





Posted by torturedsquid at 11:09 PM | 2 comments

February 18th, 2007

Gemma





like an elusive form she haunts me at night
invading me, like a dream that wouldn't go away
i feel choked by the many questions
that come to me.
why?
why she?


--- Maydz



-------------------------------------------------
::This entry is for Gem and Maydz, nga nanginvite nako for a lively feast of kinilaw and sinugba the other weekend. Bitaw, we should do it more often gyud. Too bad I was driving that time and couldn't get any RH. Anyways.

The photo is one in the series I made of Shiela B. and Choo Saturday morning. I used poster paint to get the texture of the hand, and some plastic fruit I got from our kitchen for props. It took me around 2 hours all in all to do the entire shoot, including "set" preparation.

You may check out the rest of the photos in my gallery.

Posted by torturedsquid at 02:57 PM | 1 comments

Beatles-mania


Once there was a way to get back homeward...







......

Once there was a way to get back home


Sleep pretty darling do not cry
And I will sing a lullabye

Golden slumbers fill your eyes
Smiles awake you when you rise
Sleep pretty darling do not cry
And I will sing a lullabye

Once there was a way to get back homeward
Once there was a way to get back home
Sleep pretty darling do not cry
And I will sing a lullabye


(Golden Slumbers, Beatles.)

::Golden Slumbers is the first part of a three-song cycle on the album Abbey Road, recorded by the Beatles in the summer of 1969. For Golden Slumbers, Paul McCartney borrowed some words from "Lullabye", an original by 17th-century songwriter Thomas Decker. The cycle acts as a parting message from the group before they split up.

Thanks to ALK, V_angst, Kei, V, J, and the rest of the people of Boknuts for such an emotional session last Feb 14. Thanks to Jags too for spending time with us. The week before that, ALK, over another deconstruction-over-RH session, asked me to tell him 2 of my most favorite Beatles songs. I replied in my most sober voice, "Across the universe" and "Golden Slumbers". I didn't know what difference it made, but he laughed and told me that revealed someone with some longing to be mothered (or did he mean, cared?). I became defensive over the rest of the discussion. So what if "Golden Slumbers" is a lullabye and "Across the Universe" is kinda lulling? Lol. But I guess there isn't any point arguing with people over topics they're used to chewing in the morning. These are psych/sociology teachers, after all. You just have to be careful not to be in the hot seat the next time. heh--

Posted by torturedsquid at 02:48 PM | 2 comments

February 17th, 2007

Kindness is a selfish act









::Above and two of my other photos were featured in an art exhibition held at Marriot Hotel in Cebu City last March, 2007. The exhibition was part of a series of activities for 2007 International Women's Day by organizers of Artcebu and Maharlikha.

My special thanks and congratulations to King, Jagat, Yatu, Michelle, and all of the wonderful organizers of the event.

Posted by torturedsquid at 04:41 PM | 4 comments

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