May 27th, 2006
damn it!
why does it have be always you???
... lagi na lang ikaw ang nagagalit!
... lagi na lang ikaw ang may karapatang magalit!
... lagi na lang ikaw ang tama!
... lagi na lang ikaw ang nahihirapan!
... lagi na lang ikaw ang nagho-hold on!
... lagi na lang ikaw ang nagri-reach out!
hey!!!
... please notice my efforts naman! it's not, it's never been and it will never be easy being away from you!
why do i find it so hard to write when im not overcast? am i more dynamic when im dreary? do my emotional state have to be down so i could be here as often as i used to? 

emotional issues are inevitable…
my wings do have trouble remembering how to fly right now.. can someone out there lift me to my feet?
***
i might not be here for some time… be back when im perfectly on track.
where do we go from here? is this where you really intend us to be?
after our hurtful goodbye, i tried to move on. i might have had, somehow. im happy for the fact that now, im getting most of the things that i used to dream of. that is indeed, more than a reason for me to stay happy and live (my) life to the fullest.
but why is it that despite all these, there still seems to be a certain chip that’s missing in me? i can’t find “real” joy in those things.im missing …YOU…
and worse… i still love you.